Friday, February 5, 2010

Ork Fluff: campaign league battle reports

In the campaign we gained extra points for fluffy battle reports... below are a collection of these. My first battle was against the Black Templars as I made planetfall, this battle report details a City Fight against the White Scars.

It called to them. Like the moth to flame, the ork migrated to war. The colossal spacehulk Voidfang would bring them to the fight like the countless times before... the Warpheadz serving catalyst for the ork collective psychic consciousness combined with a precarious control of Voidfang meant the beast was never far away...

And this place had the biggest fight. 'Volstad' is what the 'oomies called it, but Gargunki was not sure if that was the name of the world or the city but nor did he care. There was a fight going on and he meant to win it. He had made sure that the Mekboyz had telly-ported them down to where the fighting would be fiercest and fierce it had been against the Black beakies..."A good scrap that." Gargunki had crippled the beakie kaptin and torn their Champion in half personally... but those Beakies had a worthy fighter named "Grim-somefing". Duffed over many of his boyz that beakie did. A worthy trophy his head would be but that would have to wait. Word had it that Morbo Krunk, the most powerful of his Warpheadz, had been cut-off to the south and was under heavy bombardment. Gargunki could not risk such a valuable asset to be lost and mounting up on his Big Red trukk he sped off, following the river south on a rescue mission of sorts...

These White beakies were fast, but Black beakies or White beakies, they would all be Dead beakies in the end. Gargunki and his retinue had come up on the White beakie bikers quickly thanks to Big Red. "Red wunz go fasta ya gitz!" Gargunki yelled as he leapt from the back of the trukk towards the beakie leader. The marine kaptin was quick striking two quick shots that would have killed a lesser ork outright. The latter blow wedged the marines blade into the cybernetic workings of Gargunki's midsection. Gargunki laughed... "Dem gutz is from da Mad Dok himself." The mighty warboss knocked the marine from his bike, stunning him. Dok Narnar pounced quickly on the prone marine sawing into the dazed kaptin as he cried out in pain. "Oi Dok! How many times I gotta tell yooz? No operatin' on da enemy in da middle of a scrap! Now gimme da fightin' juice!"

Dejected, Narnar complied injecting into Gargunki a stimulant that would kill most creatures in the galaxy dead. The marine captain took this mometary delay and struck out once more "Die xenos filth!". "GAH! dat hurt!" cried Gargunki. Already injured, the marine captain could not escape as Gargunki locked onto him with his power klaw and crushed him to a bloody pulp. This fight was over... the boyz had done good.

A sudden flash drew Gargunki's attention to the roof of the building to his right. It was Morbo Krunk! The Warphead had become excitable and started telly-portin' randomly about the city again. "Quit foolin' around yooz and get down 'ere!" Gargunki bellowed.

"Squig?" replied the Warphead.
---------------------------------

I played my new Tyranids for about half the campaign but recently fielded my orks in a pickup game against the Tyranids in a Planetstrike game where I was the attacker.

Bugs. They were everywhere. Gargunki had been fighting his way through hordes of bugs for weeks and while the fightin' was good the lootin' was not. "Can't loot a zoggin' bug-fing", his meks had told him. No matter how many rivets they used the bug weaponry was useless to them... even if it was bolted onto the orkiest of fightin' machines. And what was worse, the bugz were eating all the good loot from the 'oomies! Gargunki new of only one solution to this: Build a dead killy Stompa to flatten the bugz and 'oomies alike. That'll show 'em.

Gargunki had been notified by Shuvva Luggitz aboard the Voidfang of a big 'oomie fortress not far away that was prime for lootin' but they had to act quick. Already the bug-fings had duffed the 'oomies there and were sure to eat the fortress in a matter of hours.

The order went out and the Voidfang unleashed a firestorm onto the fortress, toppling the highest tower. "I'll smash the whole zoggin' fort if I have too." thought Gargunki. "Nothing a few rivets and orky-welds can't fix."

Shuvva Luggitz had made planetfall with his retinue of Burna Boyz and along with a mob of Warbikers and sneakin' Kommandos were the first to approach the fortress only to be devoured by a mass of bugz that came seemingly out of nowhere. But Shuvva's kustom force field was the stuff of legends and the Big Mek's Battlewagon shook off the worst of the bug weapons, his Burna Boyz torching a mass of gribblies as he continued on to the fortress walls.

Fridgechukka was also along for the fight. Him and his mob of Mega-Nobz utterly tore apart a giant bug that had burrowed under the ground to attack them. Gargunki was wise to have not killed him in the pit fight that one time as he knew Fridgechukka was dead 'ard and good in a scrap. But he'd have to keep more of an eye out for him now. A big win over a monster like that would be sure to fill Fridgechukka with orky confidence and that could lead to pit fight numba two for leadership of the boyz.

Gargunki and his Nobz were the first to enter the fortress. He had used his fast moving Trukks to lead the big-dumb bugz away and he had smashed some big-gun bugz good and proppa that been guarding the western bunker of the fortress. Nothing stood in his way of the prize now...

The fight was a good 'un... and despite some boss-bug with 4 big choppas eatin' a bunch of the ladz the fortress was all but his. The last of the bugz burned out... they could set about lootin' the place.

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